The Feline Menace

Cats and Dogs
(**1/2)

Sasha Stone
Mirror film critic

   There are cat people and dog people. Lawrence Guterman’s “Cats and Dogs” appears to have been written by dog people (John Requa and Glenn Ficarra), as the dogs are the good guys and the cats are the bad guys, which has its roots in the same philosophy that tells us snakes are mean, wolves will eat you up and rats are signs that evil is present. 
However, don’t look for social commentary in “Cats and Dogs,” this is strictly an aim-to-entertain-‘em flick, broadly-reaching enough to land it in the number one spot over the weekend, beating “Scary Movie 2” and “A.I.”
   Cats have always gotten a bad rap because they are independent and slightly aloof, god love them — they will allow you pet them when it’s convenient — they don’t really follow orders very well, and their lives seem full of mystery. It’s not too far a leap, then, to imagine cats plotting grand things beyond human comprehension. We know them so well, yet not at all. 
   Dogs, on the other hand, are more outwardly friendly, aiming only to please the hands that feed them. Dogs are not without mystery, of course, especially when they hear things we can’t hear or pace around with excitement for no particular reason. The highly socialized creatures are far more similar to we narcissistic humans, which is why we give them the coveted title of Man’s Best Friend. Cats seem barely to tolerate us — always scrutinizing our behavior, making their silent judgments.
   Naturally, a film about the perceived war between the two most popular domesticated animals would be a good starting point for a summer hit. Add some cynicism (or “adult humor”), lots of great, inventive live-action animation and with the voices of Alec Baldwin, Sean Hayes, Susan Sarandon, Tobey Maguire, Michael Clarke Duncan and Jon Lovitz you have cross-over appeal for kids, parents and even pre-teens (with their ever-deep pockets) who will no-doubt come to see how’d-they-do-that?
   The plot involves a cat-coup in the works and an anti-cat coalition of dogs (led by Baldwin as “Butch”) which inadvertently chooses as its secret agent a cute little puppy named Lou (Maguire) to infiltrate the operation. Lou is to be the puppy who draws out the despondent son of the Brody family, a boy named Scott (Alexander Pollock). 
   Trouble brews when Scott’s preoccupied father (Jeff Goldblum), a scientist, is on the verge of creating an anti-allergy serum that will enable people to own more dogs, thus preventing cats from reclaiming their role as rulers of the world. Cats once ruled in Ancient Egypt but then were overthrown by dogs and ultimately human beings.  Now they want it back. 
   They are led by a Persian (voiced to great affect by Sean Hayes, from the sitcom “Will and Grace”) who hates being treated like the cute little kitty he is and really, really hates being dressed up in frilly outfits. 
   Though the plot is fairly predictable, especially if you’re familiar with the kid action flick formula (and who isn’t at this point?), but it’s not what happens, rather how it happens, that will keep the audience interested throughout. This is the world of special effects post-Titanic and Gladiator, where, for instance, a huge nazi-esque mass of rats looks realistic enough to be scary as opposed to funny. In fact, the film often teeters between being funny and frightening, yet another reason why audiences will stay riveted. 
   Aside from the most memorably funny scene (the ninja cats), at times the film is funny almost by accident. This is due to the acting, if you will, of the real animals -- particularly the gangly Butch, who handles the tougher emotional scenes better than you’d think. The pairing of voice to animal works especially well with Hayes as Mr. Tinkles — Hayes is funny anyway, but every time the white cat opens its mouth to say something, the theatre erupts with applause.
   However, it also must be noted that today’s kids’ movies are far scarier and more graphic than you’d imagine — these are kids who cut their teeth on the Rugrats. While certainly, “Bambi” is more difficult to take emotionally, these new movies appeal to a much more sophisticated kid, which is why they work better than ones that treat children as naive. Our children know much more about special effects than we parents could ever hope to know, so enthralling them these days is no easy feat. “Cats and Dogs” covers all ground and will no doubt hit big with children and adults alike. 
   In a dark alley somewhere, cats and dogs have made peace. Their new plan? To sue Warner Brothers for a share in the profits.